Surgeon will do boobs, butts, noses and more, within his ethical limits
by Chris Barry
Nickname: Swifty
Age: 47
Occupation: Plastic surgeon
Bio: This fun-lovin’ free spirit and blissfully unpretentious Westmount resident is the man to see should you ever decide you need a new set of tits or finally have something done about your ugly dog face. A former music student famous for rockin’ the bars of Crescent street in the late ’70s, Dr. Swift says becoming an MD was a painfully difficult decision for him to make. “I wasn’t sure whether to become a surgeon or a rock star.” These days his artistry is manifested in the beautiful faces, breasts, tummies and sweet asses of the countless devoted Montrealers who make up his practice.
Something “everybody” wants these days: Botox.
His most common surgical procedure: Liposuction. “Eyelids and noses run a close second and third.”
What it costs to have those few extra inches sucked out of your love handles: About $2,000.
Can you expect those handles to come right back after a few months of bingeing? No, Dr. Swift says fat never returns quite as aggressively to an area that has been liposuctioned.
What he likes to listen to while operating: “Anything from Pavarotti to Twisted Sister. Sting is just fantastic to liposuction to, the beats he has are just perfect for liposuction.”
Has he ever had a woman come see him for breast implants and after she’s disrobed subtly commented, “Holy cow, that’s one hell of a nice rack you’ve got on ya already”? Not exactly. “But I probably turn away 30 or 40 per cent of the patients that come see me for implants. Many times it would be a travesty to do the surgery. I know what can be obtained and honestly, nothing beats natural breasts. Nothing.”
Breasts he sees a lot but won’t generally work on: Those belonging to women he feels are just getting the surgery to please their spouses.
Can he add a few choice inches to your penis? “No, I don’t do that but there is a doctor in Toronto who does. You want to know what his name is? Dr. Stubbs. And you want to know the name of the guy who devised this surgery? A Chinese guy named Dr. Wang. I kid you not.”
Do his old med school buddies ever get sanctimonious on him because he spends his days sucking fat out of people and not developing a cure for cancer? “Well, there’s no doubt I’m in the vanity business, but not exclusively. It’s a pretty nice feeling to be able to reconstruct a breast that somebody has had removed because of cancer, you know.”
Something he has never done: Hard drugs like smack or cocaine. “You can really get into a bad habit when you’re a doctor. So if you never start you never have to worry about it.”
Childhood ambition: To become a rock star.
Current ambition: To become a grandfather.
A recent film he saw and hated: Punch-Drunk Love.
What’s currently in his CD player: A Night at the Opera, by Queen.
Words of wisdom: “Be passionate.” :
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